Intro: CWB4 with your host Whitney Maggot

Whitney: Hello Ladies and Gentlemen
I'm Whitney Maggot, CWB4
Good Evening
There is a huge pandemic
It's a virus
It's just getting into me
I don't really have much
It sounds something it's like uh like uh
Jungle Jungle Fever
I'm going to toss to my colleague Tim Jenkins
Tell us about this Jungle Fever

Tim: That's right
Thank you Whitney
I'm down here on Collins St. (mmhmm)
I'm speaking with a Sam (Sam: that's right)
Sam uh how do you feel about this (Sam: how do I feel) uh Jungle Fever

Sam: Let me ask you a question
You ever seen a dove
Fly with a bunch of pigeons
Nope
You ain't seen that
You know why
Cause it aint supposed to happen that's why

Whitney: Jonathan hurry up and get the kids from school
Thank you, I'm sorry folks
So the real question is
How is this fever being spread
Is it airborne
Is it in the water supply
Is it in the food supply
What's going on here?
Is the question wii all have
I have to toss to Trevor
Trevor what's going on down there

Trevor: Alright Big ups Whitney
Right now me downtown with a fine piece of ivory soap
Go by the name of Sally
Sally how you doing tonight

Sally: Hey Trevor
I feel great
I watch you every night on the news

Trevor: Ah that's right
Respect
Most blessings to me
How you feel about the fever baby?

Sally: I mean I don't know why everybody's
All in a crazy like mess for I mean
I was doing black dudes before this f*****g
Oh can I say that I'm sorry (Trevor: that's alright baby)
I don't know like I've had the fever for a long time
And like I'm cool with it

Trevor: Yeah I think it's great too
How you feel about me baby?

Sally: I mean Trevor like I said
I watch you every night on the news

Trevor: Yeah we should go somewhere right now

Sally: Well I have to go right now

Trevor: No right now

Sally: My man Wahkeem is waiting

Trevor: Yeah right now

Sally: Oh ok

Sanchez: Excuse me uh Senorita

Whitney: Jonathan I have to go

Sanchez: Uh Ms. Maggot, wii live right now, I recording now

Whitney: Oh yes, Sorry this is Whitney
Oh my gosh
You look so hot
Your buttermilk skin
And Ricky Martin Lips are
I'm F*****g infected (gasp)

British Chick: Oh my gosh
That's my colleague Whitney
She couldn't even toss to me
I'm here with Mr. Hank Wafflehouse McWilliams
And apparently

Hank: Get away from her

British Chick: I'm getting this in
The numbers are growing
It seems like nine out of ten Americans
Have been infected with Jungle Fever
Mr. McWilliams (Hank: Hi) How are you (Hank: I'm doing fine)
How do you feel about this Jungle Fever Pandemic

Hank: Ahh well you know I came here
to pick up my son William
And he's all rolling around on the floor over there
With the little colored girl with the sensitive looking hair
And you know um it's just uh it's different for me you know
Growing up this was so forbidden you know
It's forbidden, gross
Now I gotta worry about him coming home with a little
Mixed looking baby
A little cinnamon thing
I mean I guess I just

British Chick: Ahh ok ok Mr.
I have to cut back to Whitney here
I'm getting word that she's together in the studio
And she’s ready to actually have a conversation

Whitney: Oh Sanchez

Sanchez: Senorita Maggie, do you promise me you're not going to tell your husband what we did?

Whitney: As long as you don't tell him about Tyrone in the mail room

Tyrone: Ey yo Ms. Maggie, I got a package for ya

Whitney: I'll be right there Tyrone